Words have a lot of power. The things we hear from our parents when we are kids can get stuck in our memories forever. Words of love and wisdom guide us and help us be better people, while words said with anger and disbelief make us doubt ourselves for years on end. It turns out that even a common phrase that seems safe and innocent could weaken a kid’s self-esteem and make them feel insecure.
Here we found out which 12 phrases we should avoid when talking to our kids, and what things we can say instead, according to experts.
“Read to the end, your children are in danger and you do not know”
Avoid: “I’m so proud of you!” or “Great job!”
Try: “You must be so proud of your work!” or “You did that puzzle so fast!”
The first phrase seems innocent, but it’s tricky. When parents praise kids for every little thing from finishing their dinner to drawing a picture, the praise becomes meaningless. Instead, try to praise the specific things related to your kid’s accomplishments and encourage them to be self-critical and proud of the things they did really well.
Avoid: “Wait till your dad (mom) comes back home!”
Try: “Please don’t do that again. It makes me feel upset because…”
When you say the first phrase you “postpone” the consequences of your kid’s wrong behavior, and chances are, by the time the other parent comes back home, the kid will have forgotten what happened. What’s more, you frighten your child with their dad or mom turning your partner into a “bad cop” and diminish your own authority. Try to solve the problem yourself and explain to the child why you are upset with their behavior.
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